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5th-Dec-2005 10:59 pm(no subject)

MY EMAIL to the so called 'Aunt Bessie'


Would you like to join the Aunt Bessies Club: no (note the NO here from me, I do NOT want to be the Aunt Bessie Club, I merely want a signed photograph to sell on ebay)

Questions or comments: Hi Aunt Bessie, I love your Yorkshire Puddings they're just like my nan's but she's dead now. Can I have a signed picture of aunt bessie. She's my favourite brand head figure. xxx

Their reply( which took AGES mind)

"We have send you a certificate to the Aunt Bessie's club?"- We have SEND? What does that even mean? and i said i don't WANT to be in the Aunt Bessie Club, unless it's a night club that would be ACE, where they serve mini yorkshires as h'ordeurves (sp?)

Anyway back to Germany, what have I been up to? Well not a lot, the bike's still running fine I haven't fixed the new wheel onto it and the man said the old one could go "Pop" at any moment so i'm looking forward to that. I think the honeymoon period is kind of over with Germany, it's still great but that time when everything's new and great is kind of over, I think I am slowly starting to integrate really, and am just having a normal life, but in a different country! We had a class today and the teacher said that most erasmus people start their time in Germany and they go through the Honeymoon period, then often a low point comes where it's easy to feel home sick and a bit depressed, because you don't want everything to be new and tiring anymore you just want the comfort of home life!Then things get better but never as good as the first month or so of honey moon but just better and you're happy again because you start integrating, I think i am here, as i've definitely had the highs and the lows! The next stage is "re-entry shock" as she called it. We thought this sounded a bit extreme as we are only a few hours from England, hardly going to burn up as  we re-enter the earth's atmosphere. But anyway am not looking forward to having to slot back into fourth year uni life, that will be a shock, after, well i'll let you in on a little secret here readers!doing hardly any work at all! Well anyway on a lighter note there's another MENSA party tomorrow, it's to celebrate Nicolaus which is a kind of Christmas celebration they have here on the 6th of Dec i think. The tradition is that you leave your shoes out and nicolaus comes and puts chocholate in them, but if you're bad ...someone, can't remember their name, because i'm never bad, comes and hits you with a stick.

It's only 15 days until i come home now and I am looking forward to it as I can't wait to see my family and friends, also i'm really tired and just need a rest, I'm already looking forward to coming back here tho as it's all a challenge and I want to make the most of it. This week's word of the week is 'Peinlich'-which means embarassing! I've been using it a lot, to describe a lot of cringe-worthy situations, mainly involving me misunderstanding people, or not being understood. That's a good idea, I can teach you some new german with every entry. Good idea Lawz. Sorry about the infrequent updates I just want to make sure when I make one I fill it with infotaining things. xxxx Laura xxxx


Happy NicolausCollapse )
28th-Nov-2005 10:46 pm - The Bike
Ok people here it is, the long awaited update. Today's entry is based around my new bike! How exciting. As soon as I arrived here in Germany I knew I wanted a bike, I knew i wanted it to be old and I knew I wanted it to have a basket. After a few weeks and no luck finding a bike which matched this description I saw an advert on the wall in my halls and texted the number on it. A few hours later two turkish men pulled up and unloaded a bike from the boot of there car, we exchanged money for goods and off I tootled with my new bike. It only costed 25 euros and I was really pleased with my "bargain". My friend Bibi also bought a bike for thirty euros from a chinese girl.

My bike was great for one day, the next day I was cycling to uni when the left pedal started to feel strange, i lifted my foot from it and it just came off! I got off screwed it on again, pedal for a couple of hundred yards and again it comes off! this happens all the way home. I was no longer pleased with the 'bargain'. Bibi's bike was also broken, the wheels were weird. We took out bikes to the bike shop the next day and he took mine away for a few hours, Bibi's alas, was a write off! It would cost 60 euros to repair the wheels. We now hated Bibi's bike, especially because "Babsy"-bibi's bike has a tendency to fall when you stand it up, meaning that all the other bikes next to her fall too. Babsy is an embarassment. My bike Bibsy, is now fixed but still does not feel right. I have truly learnt the lesson that nothing comes for free, and also to not buy bikes from strange turks in cars. Me and Bibi went for a coffee to talk about our bikes which mine was in the shop, we left Bibi's outside the Cafe in the HOPE that it would be stolen. I suggested to Bibi thta she ring my Turks and ask if she could part exchange her bike for a new one from them. He said that he didn't have any bikes in at the moment, but, in hushed tones, that he would try and 'find' one. We commented on how funny it would be if he were to sell Bibi's bike back to her which she had left unlocked outside the Cafe. But no, Babsy was still hanging around outside the Cafe like a bad smell and we went and got my bike and cycled back. Babsy, veered into me twice and half the handle bar came off in Bibi's hand, she was trying to kill her we decided. At first we loved Babsy even though she was crap but now, as she tends to fall, we hate her. The end x
28th-Nov-2005 10:32 pm - What a fob off, if ever I heard one
My email:

'Hi Mr Kipling, I love your cakes they're exceedling good, but I think there is a better word to describe them besides EXCEEDLING good. Would you ever consider changing the description of the cakes to, yummy scrummy cakes?, because my nan says that sounds much better. Can I have a signed photograph from Mr Kipling, I think he looks lovely and my nan thinks he's a "dishy" man. Please reply because I wrote to Aunt Bessie and she was a right bitch. Love Laura x'

Their response:

'Dear Miss Muldoon

Thank you for your e-mail to our office

Mr Kipling exists in the hearts and minds of Manor Bakeries' employees and
all cake lovers, but not in fact as a real person. He was created over 30
years ago to represent the exceedingly good cakes the company was producing
and now encapsulates everything the brand stands for, and personifies what
is good about the company - its vision, its values and insistence on

I am afraid that we cannot, therefore, get him to sign a photograph for you
but appreciate your compliments and interest in our products.

Thank you for taking the time to contact us through our website.

Yours sincerely

Sue McAuley
Customer Care Manager
Mr Kipling Cakes'

WELL SUE MC AULEY, whoever you may be? MAYBE mr Kipling is not a real person to YOU, but how am I going to tell my nan that the man of her dreams does not exist, first the grandad on the werther's originals adverts, next Mr kippers...

Good DAY to you.
13th-Nov-2005 08:28 pm - new colour scheme...
I have designed a new colour scheme, I thought it was quite fitting as it is the based on the colours of the German flag. Enjoy!
13th-Nov-2005 07:32 pm - Well...
Hello, long time no update hey? But what can I say, the Del Monte reply has literally sent ripples through...no one.. ok well I have just been lazy with the Eljay recently. So what have I been doing? After making a pact with myself not to drink this week I failed miserably. It's not like it is hard not to drink for ONE week but still I could not do it. It's merely because here there is some kind of party ATLEAST once a week and everyone moans if you are the boring non-drinker. Oh i don't know why i try and place the blame on others it SHOULD be do-able I am just weak I suppose.

Uni was ok this week, ok/boring. The classes seem to drag a bit and are usually between 1.5-2 hours long which is much longer than our usual 50 minutes in England and also a lot of the classes are not really led by the teacher but the students, each week a couple of students do a Referat, which is like a presentation basically, where they learn about the topic foreach week and basically teach the rest of the class about it and then the class asks them questions with the teacher dipping in here and there to add a few extra facts. The problem with this is that of course they are just normal students, some are nervous and some do not prepare much and so sometimes it's a bit boring, but perhaps that is just because some of the things they say I just don't understand and it's hard to stay focussed. So again, like the drinking the blame really lies with me!

Yesterday (sat) I went to a really fun house party with loads of spanish people, they just grabbed these guitars and started singing spanish songs and kind of flamenco dancing, it was so great, would NEVER happen in England. They really know how to make a good party, no one was self conscious no one was totally wanged it was just fun and everyone was smiling no one was judging and making jokes like they would in England.

Today I went with some friends to get some breakfast and got back at 5pm, that was fun, we tried to go to a place where it was all you can eat breakfast for 4 euro but all the tables were reserved because it was so popular. In the end we found a place that served english breakfasts and it was great. It's really cold here now, much colder than england I can imagine and apparently it's going to snow next week which is exciting, am stocking up on coats! Well i'm quite tired this is quite a mundane entry, I know. I Don't feel this week has been evry productive, but next week I shall be hopefully be receiving some more correspondence from Del Monte, concerning their pineapples! Those poor chinese women would be scratched to death if they had to skin those! Poor lasses. I've decided I must make better use of my time here as I know it's going to be gone so quickly and I must get better at German! More reading, more talking, more listening!

On a lighter no I am gradually getting used to German bread. It's all brown and quite dry. I mean I like brown bread but it's just different, no hovis or anything like it, you have to buy it in little loaves or bun form and it hurts your jaw a bit to eat it!Also there's no bacon like in England, no walkers crisps, no MAYO! (kat) well they have mayo, two types actually, delicatessen Mayo and salat mayo, neither or which are REAL mayo! Well it's probably for the best I was trying to curb my mayo addiction anyway when I was in England.

Ciao Leute!
(leave a comment Bitches)
Dear Miss Muldoon,

Thank you for your enquiry regarding our Del Monte Mandarins.

The mandarins are produced in China and Spain, the methods of production
for each factory is different.

In China there are indeed lots of women who peel the oranges by hand. Then
there are further women who separated the oranges into individual segments.

In Spain the oranges pass through a hot water bath to loosen the peel and
then roll over a cutting wheel which cuts a small piece of peel. The
oranges then roll over a pair of rotating bars which are rotating in
opposite directions and the piece of cut peel is then gripped by the
rollers and pulled away from the orange. The peeled oranges then pass into
a machine in which there is a set of cups with rubber supports immersed in
water. The rubber supports squeeze the oranges gently and break the orange
up into segments.

The segments from both factories pass into a cleaning system to remove
final traces of the white pithy material from the outside of the segments.

The Man from Del Monte is only a character and is played by different
actors so unfortunately we do not have any photographs and he does not have
a name.

Kind Regards

7th-Nov-2005 06:35 pm - Mensa
the bitch
Ok so I have come to realise that many people have not quite grasped what the MENSA, which I have been frequently mentioning in my journal, actually is. It's like a big cantine, but it can hold about 2000 people. The food is really cheap and it's where we eat everyday. They always have random, which I can only presume are german because we definitely don't have them in England, dishes. So I have been inspired to make a new feature in my journal called, 'What Laura ate at MENSA today!', we'll see how it flies with the fans. Today I had a schnitzel, I know , I know, how German of me. A schnitzel for those that don't know is like a piece of meat which is cut very thinly and then it is rolled in bread crumbs and..cooked. This one was special though, it had cheese in the middle, sounds vile but was nice, a bit of a shock when the cheese squirted out thought mind. On the side I had some kind of sauce which I can only describe as a mayo+mustard+sauerkraut hybrid, which I got on my nose when I tried to smell it, no one saw though. Pictures to follow...
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